12 January 2009

An Awkward Re-gifting Situation

(This is the sort of thing where I miss the input from the GWF board. Sigh. FIE on Vista!)

A friend gave us a bottle of wine for Xmas in one of those gift bags; it had obviously been regifted. At least, the bag had, it still had the original tag on it (oops). We think there's nothing wrong with reusing the bag, it's better for the environment that way. Our problem is that snugged into the (reused) tissue paper surrounding the bottle was a gold pin, still in its original package. I'm having a hard time figuring out if it was intended for me. Not really my 'style' hence not picked out with me in mind, but our friend is not from the US and this pin is very much in the style of his native country.

So, if it was truly intended for me, I'd like to accept it with grace. OTOH, if it was an oversight, sooner or later the original gifter will ask our friend how his wife M. liked the pin. Yikes!

I think I have to bust him on the regifting to make sure?? Normally, I'd invite him over to share the excellent wine with us, and broach the awkward conversation, but, making it doubly difficult, there's a language barrier! The only thing I can think of right now is to enlist the help of his daughter as a translater via email (she's in school out-of-state). I hate to spread the potential embarassment but don't know how else to make sure I'm not hijacking a (possibly pricey) gift meant for someone else.

4 comments:

Playful Grace said...

I, for one, am totally supportive of regifting. Better to give it to some one who appreciates it. A gift is a gift, regardless of where it came from. Calling people on regifting is always a tough call.

My advice is to thank him for the wine and the pin, and see what his reaction is. Hey, even ask him where he got the pin, or make a comment that it's "too much" and you can't accept it.

If he freaks out, or asks "what pin"? Then he has the chance to mention that it goes in there by mistake. So, you've given him an opening, without worrying about insulting him.

Otherwise, I wouldn't worry about it.

That's my two cents to take or leave. :) Hope you are enjoying your day!

Everydaythings said...

I'm with Playful G on this one - apaprt from the fact that I cant think of any other solution to this! yikes! tough one!

RoseAnn said...

I was going to say the same thing as D. Thank him for the wine and the pin and gage his reaction.

I wholeheartedly support re-gifting; especially for someone I don't know well, I would rather see the gift given to someone with more appreciation for it if I misread the original recipient.

Jaye said...

Hi all, thanx for your input. I think I'll have to be very careful in how I word this - too excited about the gift, and he'd be embarassed to explain the mistake (if there was one) to reclaim the pin; too cool, and he'd be hurt that I didn't like his choice if it was intended for me. Sigh. I think I have to start from the premise that gifts are intended to bring pleasure and show affection, not about the 'stuff' and see where that leads.